Really, scripted on old parchment it is soft and pliable and great for getting out those stubborn dingleberries:

Critics predicted the impact would be sweeping, from silencing police officers who fear retribution for reporting department corruption, to subduing federal employees who want to reveal problems with government hurricane preparedness or terrorist-related security.

Supporters said that it will protect governments from lawsuits filed by disgruntled workers pretending to be legitimate whistleblowers.

So in order to protect from false accusations we'll just get rid of all accusations. Maybe we can pass some more decisions to protect men from those silly rape claims, cops from those ludicrous brutality charges, politicians from those nasty ethics whiners, the military from those silly brown people who should just die en masse already, and Bush from the accusations of being an incompetent nimrod.