Gay: It's what's for dinner

13 Dec
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 First Burger King tells us that if you don’t eat meat, you’re gay. Then McDonald’s follows suit. Now, Wingnut Central brings to the new existential threat to John Wayne’s Legacy:

There's a slow poison out there that's severely damaging our children and threatening to tear apart our culture. The ironic part is, it's a "health food," one of our most popular.

Now, I'm a health-food guy, a fanatic who seldom allows anything into his kitchen unless it's organic. I state my bias here just so you'll know I'm not anti-health food.

The dangerous food I'm speaking of is soy. Soybean products are feminizing, and they're all over the place. You can hardly escape them anymore.

[collection of unintelligible and undocumented pseudo-science masquerading as fact]

Soy is feminizing, and commonly leads to a decrease in the size of the penis, sexual confusion and homosexuality. That's why most of the medical (not socio-spiritual) blame for today's rise in homosexuality must fall upon the rise in soy formula and other soy products. (Most babies are bottle-fed during some part of their infancy, and one-fourth of them are getting soy milk!) Homosexuals often argue that their homosexuality is inborn because "I can't remember a time when I wasn't homosexual." No, homosexuality is always deviant. But now many of them can truthfully say that they can't remember a time when excess estrogen wasn't influencing them.

In a completely unrelated story, admitted Morningstar Vegetarian Burger lover, Reverend Paul Barnes of Grace Chapel Megachurch, resigns over admission of homosexuality.

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