Rules for Racism

A Craig’s List poster offers some rules [1] for racist etiquette: 

1. Preface your post by saying "this is just something I noticed in all Jews/Hispanics/Blacks/Asians". I mean, if its just an observation, it can't be racist.
2. Preface your post by saying how you have plenty of Jewish/Hispanic/Black/Asian friends, but you need to let this off your chest.
3. Before making a blatantly racist statement, CLEARLY state that you are not a racist. This absolves you.
4. Make sure you insult that particular race's women. Do they have big butts? Hooked noses? Greasy hair? Let them know! After all, its just something you noticed.
5. ALWAYS quote statistics. Did the Vatican research board determine that 98.7% of all homosexuals are condemned to hell for all eternity? Cite it. Did a Klan survey find that Jews are 78% more likely to be cheap and smelly? Copy and paste baby!
6. Don't forget to insult that race's homeland, even if most of them have never been there. Latin America/the Middle East/Asia/Africa sure does suck, and its YOUR responsibility to let people know anonymously through the internet.
7. Be sure to describe, in detail, an incident you saw/heard about/made up in which a member of an ethnic group lived up to their stereotype. Every academic thesis needs field research before it gets published.
8. USE CAPS AND EXCLAMATION POINTS TO MAKE IT SEEM AS THOUGH YOU'RE SCREAMING!!!!!
9. Anyone who disagrees with you is obviously a limp-wristed tree-hugging liberal, and their opinion is automatically discounted.

**IMPORTANT** Under no circumstances should you check your spelling or grammar. 

This reminds me of the joke: Q. What’s the beginning of every racist joke?  A. Turning around and making sure nobody else is listening.

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